A dark, sober room, misty with smoke,
and men do their best to look casual there,
study the others, the barhandling bloke,
and dream of the women that come to this lair.
And there I did enter, hid behind my friends,
and I felt so groped by the looks they gave me,
it felt like their eyes were undressing like hands,
I could not stop wondering at what they did see.
So many women around me looked better,
and I felt so ugly, so gross, imperfect.
but it is not lust or the body that matters,
it’s all about care and a deep found respect.

Then close by the phone rang, a man took it out,
and finished his chat in a minute or two,
and I knew just what I would now talk about,
and started to talk to him out of the blue.
I felt that I liked him, his eyes hid a smile,
he told me he Mastered and I heard him tell
what he knew important, and I liked his style,
he showed a kind soul but was steel-eyed as well.
He showed me his gear and so skilled were his hands,
I felt both so forward, so scared, and so coy.
for he said it’s not just control that he wants,
it’s all about sharing a moment of joy.

He courted me just like my husband had done,
and I felt so flattered with all his attention,
until insecurity quickly had gone,
and then he carefully did dare to mention
that he would enjoy to share pleasure with me,
and asked if I had the courage for that,
that he would make sure to be careful to see
to it that I would feel safe and not bad.
He made me wear collar and cuffs of his own,
and he made me giggle there, time and anew,
it wasn’t just harshness or strictness he’s shown,
since humor and laughter he wanted there too.

His eyes smiled as he put me through a slave’s paces,
showed in his hand a strength gentle but firm,
and I felt secure and did not lose my graces,
unlike other times, though he oft made me squirm.
He accorded me pity, for which I so yearn,
said time and again: “Oh you poor little one,
that has to take all of these sadists and learn
how to take all this pain that will never be done.”
He showed me to bend and yet stay standing tall,
and I wondered how flexible he showed himself there,
I saw it is not about hatred at all,
but all about love, and respect, hope and care.